The plan here is to collect some chicken jokes, inspired by David Morin’s similar thing with physicists. I try to answer the age old question of Why did the chicken cross the road? from the perspective of different mathematicians.
John Nash: Because the chicken always does what is best for the chicken. The chicken does not care for the group.
Newton: Because the chicken does not understand what a vector is.
Pythagoras: Because the chicken’s angle was not right.
Fermat: I know the answer, but this message is too short to write it.
Ramanujan: I don’t know. The chicken is finite. I know infinity.
Serge Lang: I leave it as an exercise to the reader.
Erdös: Because he wanted to write a joint paper with me.
Mandelbrot: The chicken crossed the road because the chicken crossed the road because the chicken crossed the road….
Alan Turing: It is an enigma to me.
C. L. Dodgson: Alice is also wondering the same.
Möbius: She didn’t, she just got back to where she started.
Penrose: Because she couldn’t climb the stairs.
Stephen Hawking: Because the black hole in the pavement bothered her.