The plan here is to collect some quotes that I have heard somewhere. They will not be categorized according to subject now, maybe in the future I may do so.
The set of things that I don’t know is dense in any topology.
Fabio Vlacci in a complex analysis lecture at ICTP
Now we move quickly and painfully, or painlessly depending on who you are, and derive the Schrödinger equation.
Douglas Hofstadter while speaking at a Mathematics Collouquim in the University of Vienna, 2017.
Every math talk should include at least one joke and one proof, preferably distinct.
Henry Cohn while speaking at a Summer School for PhD students of the University of Vienna, Obergurgl, September 2017.
Someday somebody will be able to write a paper with a great title ‘The best packing is the best, or ‘not…’, it won’t make sense unless someone knows which is which.
Henry Cohn explaining about results of Best in sphere packing, Obergurgl, September 2017.
If you are going to read only one thing about information theory then this is it; also you should read at least one thing about information theory in your life.
Henry Cohn, Obergurgl, September 2017.
The world of math is path connected.
Mathias Kreck while lecturing about Poincare Conjecture, Obergurgl, September 2017.
God created the world in four dimensions, well 11 if you are a string theorist. But it’s 4+7.
Mathias Kreck while lecturing about Poincare Conjecture, Obergurgl, September 2017.
The name is what it is. But it’s wrong.
Mathias Kreck on positive definite kernels, Obergurgl, September 2017.
Mathematics is the universal language that no one speaks.
Pierre Loius Lions, Vienna, September 2017.
I have a lot of knowledge in my computer.
Vivien Ripoll referring to the files saved on his computer, while at lunch in Vienna, 2017.
If you are dying it’s supposed to be a full time job, but Ramanujan sent a letter three months before his death to Hardy.
George Andrews speaking about Ramanujan, Hagenberg, 2017.
The airline ticket pricing policy was very fortunate, if you spend three weeks in Europe then the price was $\epsilon$, if you spent less than three weeks then it was $\dfrac{1}{\epsilon}$.
George Andrews while speaking about how he discovered Ramanujan’s Lost Notebook, Hagenberg, 2017.
I became the leading expert on mock theta functions, in the sense that no one else knew about it at that time.
George Andrews speaking about Ramanujan, Hagenberg, 2017.
Please think of this 4 as a 5.
George Andrews pointing out a typo in one of his slides, Hagenberg, 2017.
Harold Potter came, then some magic happened.
Michael Schlosser referring to a result by H. Potter, mathematician, Vienna, 2017.
If you don’t think this is a beautiful formula, then you are in the wrong conference.
Ole Warnaar while showing a massive hypergeometric identity to an audience at Combinatory Analysis 2018, to celebrate George Andrews’ 80th birthday, PennState, June 2018.
Focus on Dyson because, one he is math hero, two he is much older than me, and three he is still alive.
George Andrews making a joke during Combinatory Analysis 2018, to celebrate George Andrews’ 80th birthday, PennState, June 2018.
If you don’t like ultrafilters, you should not do algebra.
Hans Schoutens while explaining ultrafilters at a summer school for PhD students of the University of Vienna, Techendorf, Austria, September 2018.
The biology group has about 50 members and 5000 mice, …., this is the math building with about 15 members and no mice.
László Erdős while giving a short description of IST Austria at a summer school for PhD students of the University of Vienna, Techendorf, Austria, September 2018.
Most companies do not use elliptic curves for cryptography because they do not know the difference between elliptic curves and an ellipse.
Adolfo Quirós Gracián while explaining about elliptic curve cryptography at a summer school for PhD students of the University of Vienna, Techendorf, Austria, September 2018.
Continued fractions need continued black boards.
Alan Sokal while lecturing at Hagenberg about his work with continued fractions, July 2019.
Anthropologically it is great to see if you can make fire with stones but I prefer a lighter.
Manuel Kauers on computer and hand calculations at a lecture in Johannes Kepler University, Linz in 2019.
Definite is everything which is not indefinite.
Manuel Kauers when someone in the audience asked what he means by definite sum, Johannes Kepler University, Linz in 2019.